It's game 7 of the NBA finals and a man makes his way to his seat at center court. He sits down and notices that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone is sitting there. He responds, "No, the seat's empty." "The first man exclaims, "What?!? Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the NBA finals and not use it?" The neighbor responds, "Well the seat is mine, but my wife passed away and this is the first NBA finals we haven't been together." The first man responds," I'm sorry to hear that. Wasn't there anyone else, a friend or relative, that could've taken that seat?" The neighbor responds, "No, they're all at the funeral."
Golfer: "I'd move heaven & earth to break 100 on this course." Caddy: "Try heaven; you've already moved most of the earth."
A Giants fan, a Padre fan, and a Dodger fan are climbing a mountain and arguing about who loves his team more. The Padre fan insists he's the most loyal. "This is for San Diego!" he yells and jumps off the side of the mountain. Not to be outdone, the Giants fan is next to profess his love for his team. He yells, "This is for San Francisco!" and pushes the Dodger fan off the mountain.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!
How many snowboarders does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 50: 3 to die trying, 1 to actually pull it off, and 46 other to say, "man, I could do that!"
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?" The engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
I named my hard drive "dat ass," so once a month my computer asks if I want to "back dat ass up."
A man hasn't been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results. "I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left." "Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "How long have I got?" "Ten," the doctor says sadly. "Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!" "Nine..."
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
A Spanish captain was walking on his ship when a soldier rushes to him and exclaims, "An enemy ship is approaching us!" The captain replies calmly, "Go get my red shirt." The soldier gets the shirt for the captain. The enemy ship comes in and heavy rounds of fire are exchanged. Finally, the Spaniards win. The soldier asks, "Congrats sir, but why the red shirt?" The captain replies, "If I got injured, my blood shouldn't be seen, as I didn't want my men to lose hope." Just then, another soldier runs up and says, "Sir, we just spotted another twenty enemy ships!" The captain calmly replies, "Go bring my yellow pants."
Q: How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two: one to change it and another one to change it back again.
China, Russia, and Poland venture to space. China says they'll go to Pluto because it's the farthest. Russia says they'll go to Jupiter because it's the biggest. Poland says they'll go to the Sun. Russia and China warn that they'll melt. They reply, "We'll go at night."

© Copyright 2013 Biscaya. Be nice. Collect from

feedback

Theme Options

Layout Style

Color Schemes

Bg Patterns (for boxed)

Bg Images (for boxed)



夸夸妈妈作文200字梅花作文600字有诗意老师幸福的笑了作文500快乐的六一150作文空闲时间运动英语作文夸夸妈妈作文200字考试失利作文开头老师幸福的笑了作文500理想的英语作文模板劳动课作文200字宽容作文700字高中夸夸妈妈作文200字老爷爷摔倒作文范本宽容作文700字高中老师幸福的笑了作文500考教师资格证的作文范文科技的创新600字作文空闲时间运动英语作文空闲时间运动英语作文妈妈我敬佩你作文100字李白人品。初中作文夸夸我的妹妹作文300字理想的英语作文模板科技创新是什么 作文老师表扬了我作文500夸夸同学作文三百字快乐的六一150作文考研英语漫画作文坚持妈妈我敬佩你作文100字乐享人生作文一部上古卷轴的史诗巨作。 一部人类英雄的传说。昆明,又叫春城,这是现在众人皆知的名字;但很少有人知道,这座约三万年前,即有人类生活的地区,就是古代佛经里经常提到的“膳戒城”。而更是鲜为人知的是,这座城市又叫龙穴。有龙穴的地方就有龙,有龙的地方就会有一个神秘而又古老的职业,那就是锁龙人。 而在民国时期,战乱不止妖孽横行,锁龙人在昆明一带活动频繁,大部分锁龙人降妖除魔的事都发生在这座城市之中,只是时间久远,不一定全是真事。我说你听,这是一个关于锁龙人的故事。鲛人无意中看到唐敖一行,见他们一个个风度翩翩、举止不凡,心中好生羡慕;又听说唐朝是个繁华富庶之所,心向往之,于是一段艰辛的奇幻之旅便开始了。方铭入赘刘家三年,成了整个秦州人尽皆知的废婿。 一场诬陷竟意外导致他祖传玉佩被融合激活,方铭一朝觉醒,一双神瞳能鉴世间万物。 奇珍异宝在我手,古玩界里任遨游,纵横都市我为王。 方铭:“我真的只想安静的做个废婿!可实力真的不允许啊!”拥有灭魔血脉的木子余在十六岁觉醒了灭魔血脉之力,从此告别了平凡人生,更因为一次意外,掉落山崖,获得了不死天功传承,打开了更为广阔的一片天地。“呐,呐,你的异能是什么?” “明明知道自己要付出的代价,为什么还要用,真是个笨蛋!” “指令:控制!” “就算是锋利的东西,也是可以守护好想守护的。” “绽放吧,红莲!” “这次轮到我保护你了。” “接下来就交给姐姐我吧!” “从拿起刀的那一刻起,你已经输了。”数十年的大战,少年的世界早已满目疮痍。 幸得框架建成,少年担起了拯救世界的重任,决心要把更强的力量从框架中带出来,拯救危若累卵的世界! 然而,太古时代已毁,第五时代岌岌可危,少年能否改变走向灭种边缘的文明?有人问:“生活的意义是什么?”我说:生活的意义就是不需要去寻找它的“意义”,我们活在这个光怪陆离的世界里,像是星辰大海、繁星点点,而意义就在于:我们,慢慢发光的那一个过程。 还有人问:“那爱情呢,是什么?” 爱情……也许会让你这颗“星”熄灭,但总会出现一个人点亮你的世界。 我叫周东黎,我用我的故事来告诉你,什么是生活,而什么又是爱情。 天启年间,大明内忧外患,后金虎视眈眈,天下即将陷入纷争。   天启帝朱由校,朱由检,努尔哈赤,皇太极,多尔衮,褚英,代善,魏忠贤,卢象升,杨世昌,熊廷弼,洪承畴,李自成,袁崇焕,张献忠,吴三桂,范景华,徐光启,金圣叹,宋应星……   奸臣与忠臣的对抗,枭雄与英雄的较量,后金南袭,堂堂大明岌岌可危,国破山河在,城春草木深,偌大华夏黎民哭悲,无数豪杰四起。    然而此时。   扬州城里,危机四伏。   一个暗地权财滔天,蛰伏于此,身怀家族之仇却不引人注意的悠闲赘婿胡天洲,正过着看似逍遥自在的生活,每日和小孩过家家,没事逗逗美丽的妻子……   一个理科大学生意外灵魂穿越来到异界大陆,重生在战场之中。这是一个以玄气修炼为尊的玄之大陆,他历经磨难却百折不挠,从小小的玄者到一方霸主的玄王,他的每一步都异常的艰险,精彩人生,从穿越异界开始。
飓风星神 我的世界之颠倒模组 人与机器人的末日之战 仙界凡间 G先生的异界旅行指南 异界元素 争霸 九龙剑尊 我在沿途的风景等你 迷途与归路 冰雪七零七 宇宙的星纪元 妖孽小村医 魔帝归来1 鸿冥重临 因爱生恨,短篇 一舞动四方 艾芙海姆 烟火Fireworks 拳破魔域 鉴宝神瞳 夸夸同学作文三百字 考教师资格证的作文范文 浪费食物的现象英语作文 空闲时间运动英语作文 梅花作文600字有诗意 考研英语漫画作文坚持 浪费食物的现象英语作文 老师教我的作文500字 经历也是一种体验 作文 老爷爷摔倒作文范本 夸夸我的妹妹作文 夸夸我的妹妹作文 科技创新是什么 作文 考教师资格证的作文范文 夸夸妈妈作文200字 老师表扬了我作文500 梦想当医生 英文作文 夸夸同学作文三百字 乐享什么作文 老师幸福的笑了作文500 看清目标的作文 老师幸福的笑了作文500 乐享什么作文 夸夸我的妹妹作文300字 劳动课作文200字 空调说明书英语作文 夸夸同学作文三百字 乐享什么作文 乐享什么作文 经历也是一种体验 作文 空闲时间运动英语作文 看清目标的作文 快乐的六一150作文 夸夸妈妈作文200字 科技创新是什么 作文 老师表扬了我作文500 快乐的六一150作文 浪费食物的现象英语作文 科技创新是什么 作文 夸字作文300字 老师表扬了我作文500 老师教我的作文500字 妈妈我敬佩你作文100字 梦想当医生 英文作文 宽容作文700字高中 看清目标的作文 夸夸我的妹妹作文 老师表扬了我作文500 空调说明书英语作文 科技的创新600字作文 亚星官网 亚星官网 亚星官网 亚星官网 亚星官网 七轩 大夏执刀人. 神武帝尊 食味滋 梦尘烟 澳门葡京官网 万利官网 欧博游戏官网 亚星游戏官网 葡京官网 夸夸同学作文三百字 梅花作文600字有诗意 考试失利作文开头 快乐的六一150作文 宽容作文700字高中 夸夸同学作文三百字 梦想当医生 英文作文 科技的创新600字作文 妈妈我敬佩你作文100字 浪费食物的现象英语作文 理想的英语作文模板 空调说明书英语作文 李白人品。初中作文 考教师资格证的作文范文 梅花作文600字有诗意 老师幸福的笑了作文500 快乐的六一150作文 夸字作文300字 经历也是一种体验 作文 乐享人生作文 考研英语漫画作文坚持 考研英语漫画作文坚持 理想的英语作文模板 梦想当医生 英文作文 老师幸福的笑了作文500 夸夸我的妹妹作文 梅花作文600字有诗意 可爱的蓝精灵作文400字 梅花作文600字有诗意 老爷爷摔倒作文范本